To be present with others meant physically putting my devices out of sight and mentally silencing the thoughts of what I was going to do after or what I should’ve done prior. This made me truly cherish the time I saw people in person. The pandemic restrictions prevented friends and family from seeing one another or made it limited to outdoor spaces or a specific number of people.

Though it takes some time to notice, all it takes is a mindful moment - of truly seeing my surroundings, listening to the sounds around me, feeling the floor beneath me, smelling the natural scents, and tasting my meal for its entirety to ground myself in the present again.

As much as I’d like to be present at all hours of the day, I often fall back into auto-pilot and go about life unconsciously. Since developing this ability, I’ve been much more in-tune with myself - I notice when I get anxious and learn to follow my intuition. However, through time, I was able to slow down the busyness and unlock my third eye. Initially, I wasn’t able to sit in silence and observe myself - I felt like my mind was moving so quickly and I couldn’t hold up a stop sign. Being present with myself began through a formal meditation process, but has transitioned to mindful living. In the past three years, I honed into being present with myself and others. I had to stop planning for the future, given the restrictions and uncertainty. That distribution shifted as the pandemic forced me to slow down and pause. Pre-pandemic, I would say I spent 20% of my time in the past, 10% in the present, and 70% in the future. I am guilty of spending the majority of my time in the world of possibilities - from minute tasks such as what will I cook for dinner to what will my passions be at 50? For Suleika, cancer was the trigger to be present. It puts a pause on the ruminating thoughts of past missteps and plans of the future. “Ultimately the events of the last few years have been a terrible lesson in being present, and not just being present in my own life, but being present in the lives of the people I love.”ĭeath, or near-death experiences, shakes us up and reminds us to relish in all that we have. While I enjoyed watching Suleika’s entire journey unfold in Between Two Kingdoms, there are three quotes that especially resonate and draw parallels to my own life. When you juxtapose my “normal” life as a healthy, 25-year old on the brink of a quarter-life crisis, the points of connection are far from limited. Her journey leaves you in sympathy with how her cards were dealt. Suleika Jaouad: diagnosed with leukemia at 22, fought for her life the next 4 years, and embarked on a 100-day, 150,000-mile road trip shortly after remission.

Between two kingdoms